Categorical Aperitif

Jonah Goldberg and Glenn Beck blathering for an hour on CNN, relying on lame, desperate straw man arguments to try to connect FDR and Barack Obama to Hitler.

Goldberg's and Beck's "reasoning" seems to look something like this:

1. The belief that politicians will solve all your problems is fascistic.
2. Obama's supporters (like those of FDR and Hitler) believe that Obama will solve all their problems.
3. Therefore, Obama's supporters are fascistic.

Leaving aside the obvious problems with premise 1—i.e., "delusional" would be a better word for such a belief than "fascistic"—the Straw Man shoulders his scratchy way in in premise 2. I mean, really: is there any good reason to accept premise 2? Can anyone seriously maintain that Obama's supporters believe this? Do you really hear Obama supporters saying things like this?

• "I'm voting for Obama because he'll get rid of my crabgrass."
• "I'm voting for Obama because he'll fix the leaky manifold in my '68 Impala."
• "I'm voting for Obama because he'll help me lose unsightly inches off my hips, waist, and thighs."

I know that this "People think Obama's the Messiah" schtick is just one of many pieces of moldy rhetorical pasta currently being flung at the walls by the Right's propaganda chefs to see what'll stick—no doubt you recall its comrades, "Obama doesn't engage in empty patriotic displays with sufficient zeal" and "Obama is a secret Manchurio-Muslim candidate"—but come on: an entire CNN hour of Jonah Goldberg and Glenn Beck spouting crap like this?

If people like Beck and Goldberg can't see the obvious problems with this "reasoning," then they're idiots—and they don't belong on cable "news."

If people like Beck and Goldberg can see the obvious problems with this "reasoning" but happily engage in it anyway, then they're shameless whores—and they don't belong on cable "news."

Either way, what does it say about the "Cable News Network" that they'd waste an hour with this sort of idiocy/whoring?

(Cue deep James Earl Jones voice saying "I had Jello today.")