Monday, May 15, 2006
Richard Cohen: a Scientific Analysis
Is Richard Cohen funny?
Humor is subjective, but the evidence here is overwhelmingly and painfully clear: Cohen is not "a funny guy." He is funny like Karl Rove is sexy.Is Richard Cohen courageous?
Cohen’s columns did periodically raise questions about the cause for war—for example, he criticized Bush for not supplying the intelligence to back up its claim of Iraq’s potential nuclear capabilities, albeit because he worried that the administration would overstep its rhetorical bounds and reduce the chance that Cohen could have the war he so anxiously desired.The upshot?
But on balance his writing had all the nuance of the World War I-era stories in the British press about German soldiers marching through Belgium with babies on their bayonets. Cohen has now become more critical of the war—"Whatever Bush’s specific reason or reasons," he wrote on March 30, "the one thing that’s so far missing from the record is proof of him looking for a genuine way out of war instead of looking for a way to get it started." Ironic, given his own pre-war calls for blood. It reminds me of a Randy Newman concert I went to in the 1980s. "This is a song," Randy said from the stage, "in which I strongly come out against the war in Vietnam. Now that it’s safe."
Thus, we can safely say that Cohen is not qualified to judge Colbert’s performance. And we can also say: President Bush, check your lap. There's someone there who needs petting.What do you think, hideous alien puppet pundit?